toxic parents
Don’t let them fool you.
Life-changing advice has one problem.
It can change your life both ways — good and bad. Many people want to give you their opinion, but most are full of shit.
I’ve listened to a bunch of nonsense.
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“Go into this career, it’s the best.”
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“I’ve changed, please trust me.”
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“I’m sorry, it won’t happen again.”
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“I know this for a fact.”
When someone’s words turn out to be as reliable as a seatbelt Made in China, it’s frustrating and can cause a lot of damage. In the worst case, you’ll lose a ton of time, money, and energy — and get hurt in the process.
That’s why it’s so important to spot the subtle signs before you fall for their empty words.
They Are the Loudest People in the Room
Nothing screams “I’m full of shit” like someone who actually screams.
And I’m not just talking volume.
After I finished my workout a few weeks ago, I tried to stuff about two arms full of sweaty gym equipment into a small scooter. While I struggled with socks that smelled — and felt — like a homeless guy’s balls, I eavesdropped on a conversation.“Yeah bro, you gotta take Test every other day and then you gotta stack D-bol on top of it…”
I don’t mind guys talking steroids, but the two specimens in question knew fuck-all about them. Their arms looked like cooked Spaghetti. Yet, they acted like they had a PhD in performance-enhancing drugs.
This is a slight variation of the Dunning-Kruger effect.
The people who know least often think they know most — so they spill their wisdom like a guy with Parkinson’s his soup.
The more someone talks, the more shit comes out of their mouth.
They Try Too Hard To Convince You
My dad once told me a crucial life lesson I’ll never forget.
“There are two sides to every medal.”
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Financial freedom is amazing but takes tons of sacrifice upfront
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Being jacked looks great but also means you’ll have to spend hours in the gym and watch your nutrition carefully
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Becoming successful often makes you lonely or makes you question the realness of your friendships
This knowledge is why I get suspicious when people try to sell me something as 100% positive.
When I did my Bachelor studies, I attended a career fair. Lots of important-looking, suited-up guys would praise their companies as the best thing since ass warmers. During a Q&A, I asked them:
“What’s a downside of your job or company?”
After a few seconds, he answered along the lines of everything’s perfect.
Yeah, that’s a no from me, dawg.
When people act like they found the holy grail that will cure all your problems including butthole cancer, you know something’s fishy.
Ask them about the downsides. If they don’t have a good answer, they’re full of shit.
They Go out of Their Way To Tell You They Are a Certain Way
The people who truly believe in something are the ones trying to convince you least.
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Does the Dalai Lama tell everyone he’s a good person?
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Does a bodybuilder lecture people on how disciplined they are?
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Does a confident person boast about all their awesome achievements?
People do not tell you about their character to convince you. They do it to convince themselves.
My ex told me over and over how much she changed. She believed it. I believed it. Yet, it was about as truthful as a politician close to elections.
This often isn’t an ill intention. People don’t want to fuck you over. Their words merely show how they’d like to be.
Be cautious when they’re trying to convince you of something way too hard.
Their actions always show the truth.
They Are All Talk and No Walk
I’ve been running an online business for years — and you wouldn’t believe the shit I’ve seen.
The problem is anyone can pretend to be anything on the internet.
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Ghostwriters who haven’t sent a single email
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Social media growth services that have no more than 200 followers
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Business coaches who never ran a business before
The first thing I look for when someone tries to convince me of their skills, knowledge, or large Schlong is if they have the accomplishments to back it up.
Why is this so important?
Because theory and practice are often miles apart.
Yes, you can know everything about nutrition, exercise profiles, and ideal rest times — but hitting the gym five times a week and sticking to your diet is a whole different animal.
Theoretical knowledge alone is worth less than a burned pancake dropped on a city sidewalk.
Believe the walk, not the talk.
Big Liars
What Psychological Science Tells Us About Lying
and How You Can Avoid Being Duped
By Christian L. Hart, Ph.D.
They Can’t Answer Your Questions Simply
Richard Feynman was one of the biggest geniuses of our time.
The Nobel prize winner once said (paraphrased):
“If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.”
This quote has become my favorite full-of-shit test.
One of my friends has shiny object syndrome. He hops on every hype train. A few years ago, when AI was still a faraway dream, he told me scientists are developing an AI to rid the oceans of plastic.
But when I asked him to explain, I only heard crickets.
Ocean cleaning has got nothing to do with AI and everything with currents, wildlife, plastic patches, and overall logistical nightmares. You need hands-on, physical equipment to remove plastic from water.
Not a fucking AI.
People often drop buzzwords because they make them sound smart. They also hide behind complex terms and explanations to balance their lack of knowledge.
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The coworker who has a new amazing idea
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The sales guy trying to convince you of their groundbreaking solution
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The friend who knows how to solve every global problem
Simply ask, “Could you please explain that in simple terms?”
You either get a simple explanation or watch their house of cards crumble like dry apple pie.
Win-win.
How To Spot People Who Are Full of Shit
To avoid falling for someone’s bullshit, watch out for these signs:
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They are the loudest people in the room and brag endlessly with their knowledge.
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They try to hard to convince you.
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They keep telling you everything about them without ever backing it up.
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They talk the talk but have no evidence of walking the walk.
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They can’t explain what they talk about in simple terms.
Listen to the life-changing advice. But make sure it changes your life for the better, not worse.
Source: medium.com
Related Blog: Transitions and Changes in Your Life
By Dr. Shannon Kolakowski
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