“You can recognize survivors of abuse by their courage. When silence is so very inviting, they step forward and share their truth so others know they aren’t alone.”
~Jeanne McElvaney
“You can recognize survivors of abuse by their courage. When silence is so very inviting, they step forward and share their truth so others know they aren’t alone.”
~Jeanne McElvaney
Just try to be as much help to your partner. You can only do much, it always falls unto the person if he or she wants to change his/her lifestyle. People have the tendency to change but it always require a simple push to make them do it.
Nothing changes, if nothing changes.
Pushing ourselves to take action is so fundamental to making changes in our lives that make a difference. Keep pushing, Conrad.
“his inability to love people, and his inability to be present in situations”… I think I know someone facing narcissism. Always hurting someone from some deep thoughts shared. Can he be cared? Please😭😭😭
No he can’t Wilson, some people are unreachable.
Is not eassy at all to have a relationship with a narcisist especially when there are feelings involved. I have a friend in a relationship like that and it didnt end well.
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The true meaning of love is sacrifice. This situation is hard, being a partner of a narcissist is never easy or never going to be easy. At first you wouldn’t realize how life would be hard until you live together and discover each other’s flaws. But if you truly love a person it’s loving both, his good side and the bad. Becoming a spouse of a narcissist is forgeting your emotions and understanding more because if it’s not you who else in the world would do it? It’s your love that will lighten him everyday, always think about how thankful… Read more »
Clarissa – You nailed it! Sacrifice is truly at the heart of so many relationship issues. The question becomes, how does someone build up the capacity and empathy to make sacrifices. This is another topic that Your iNspiration Nation will deal with a future post.
The narcissistic person does not feel empathy for his partner. Relationships with people with narcissistic disorder are difficult. I think it is better to break them to avoid losing yourself in them.
Check out this article on Psychology.com: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/201712/the-heartbreak-relationships-narcissists
Thanks for sharing your very touching story. I am sorry you had to go through all that.
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I had no idea that there was such a thing as Narcissistic Personality Disorder. This is very eye opening for me.
Here is a link to an article on Psychology.com to shed light on Narcissistic Personality Disorder: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder
A lot of people are in the same boat as you were in your relationship. I just pray they come to the realization you came to sooner rather than later.
Most times it takes to long before someone is willing to make the necessary change. But once they do find the strength to move on, they come out stronger than ever.
It’s very noble of you to bring this issue to the light. I bet a lot of marriages have this issue but don’t know how to go about it.
Such an insightful point, Oliver. And, what makes it worse between married couples is the sub-text that they marital commitment imposes on them which makes them feel obligated to stay in an abusive relationship. Those who find themselves there should see professional guidance.
The worst thing we can do is to blame ourselves when we are with a narcissistic individual. It can be truly damaging.
And a narcissist has the uncanny ability to do exactly that to another person. See thru the facade and you see the real person.
I am very happy that you pointed out the issue of handling your own finances. Nothing is as liberating as the feeling of independence.
Teddy – Financial independence enables one to make strong decisions in life. Needing someone for financial support often makes you compromise your values and well being. Stay strong!
Narcissistic people are only after validation due to their deep sense of insecurity. That’s the bare truth.
Insecurity is quicksand in a person’s life. The key is recognizing that someone is standing in it and trying to pull you down with them.
I admire you for having gone through all this and still remaining strong. It’s also touching that you managed to understand your spouse at such a deep level.
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It can be so difficult to deal with a narcissistic person due to how overly complicated they are. All they need is some love and recognition.
It’s true, unfortunately, the love and recognition they crave come at the expense of another’s emotional well being. If you do not see demonstrable change in someone, then you need to be the one who makes the change.
“Do not allow yourself to become drained, and do not feel guilty for needing to take time away to recharge.” Those are very powerful and vital words. I will heed them.
Guilt is mentally and emotionally draining. Be more mindful and caring for what you put yourself through as you experience adversity.
Doing something you love evryday can help greatly with your state of mind. This is especially true is a narcissistic person is bringing too much negativity to your life.
Stay focused on moving forward. Staying in the game is half the battle.
You shouldn’t blame yourself Janine. Other people have a way of manipulating people and sometimes it takes a while for a while to sink in because you have a big heart. Wishing you all the best moving forward.